Need some list-minute gift ideas for Christmas? Behold!
With a contentious Election Day upon us and predictions of a protracted contest over the votes running wild, it is time to turn to the shelter of prayer–and the liquor cabinet. Here are three liquid suggestions for how to survive the presidential election.
1. Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception
The patron saint of the USA is Mary under the title of Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception. We pray that the Immaculate Conception may help our country have an immaculate (unstained) election.
Honor Our unspotted Lady with perhaps the finest cocktail ever made:
1 egg white
2 tsp. powdered sugar
1 oz. gin
1 oz. vodka
1 oz. Cointreau
1 tbsp. fresh lemon juice
1 dash lemon bitters (optional)
1 lemon twist
Beat the egg white and powdered sugar until firm but not stiff (a frother or hand-held mixer speeds up the process). Pour the egg mixture and all other liquid ingredients except lemon bitters into a shaker with ice and shake forty times. Strain into a cocktail glass and add lemon bitters and twist.
2. St. Thomas More
St. Thomas More, the patron saint of statesmen, knew a thing or two about political roller coasters. Honor the Man for All Seasons with one of our original cocktails, a Drink for All Seasons:
A Drink for All Seasons
1½ oz. cognac
½ oz. yellow chartreuse
½ oz. Cointreau
½ oz. lemon juice
3 angostura bitters
Pour ingredients into a shaker with ice and shake forty times. Strain into a cocktail glass.
3. St. Jude
And when all else fails, there is always St. Jude, the patron saint of desperate or hopeless causes. Need we say more? Oh yes, the drink name and recipe.
2 oz. Patrón Añejo tequila
¾ oz. sweet vermouth
½ oz. amontillado sherry
¼ oz. Cynar (artichoke liqueur)
1 orange twist for garnish
Pour liquid ingredients into a mixing glass with ice and stir forty times. Strain into a cocktail glass and garnish with orange.
Just one request: if you are counting ballots, please enjoy these drinks after you are done.
On Saturday, October 31, 2020, Father Michael J. McGivney, founder of the Knights of Columbus, will be beatified. To celebrate this event, I am pleased to announce the creation of a cocktail in Blessed Michael’s honor.
The Michael J
¾ oz Brady’s Irish Cream
½ oz Litchfield Straight Bourbon
1 oz Pallini Limoncello
Pour all ingredients into a shaker filled with ice and shake forty times. Strain into an old-fashioned glass filled with ice and garnish with a lemon twist and a small spoon, preferably brass.
This ultra smooth and almost frothy cocktail has three ingredients, one for Blessed Michael’s ancestral home, one for his adopted home, and one for his supernatural home.
Brady’s Irish Cream is from County Cavan, Ireland, where both of Michael’s parents were born. The distiller boasts of being “one of the oldest cream liqueur plants in the world,” so perhaps his mom and dad enjoyed a glass during their time in the old country. If you can’t find a bottle of Brady’s at your neighborhood liquor store, Blessed Michael won’t mind if you substitute Bailey’s or some other brand.
Blessed Michael was born in Waterbury, CT, served as a priest in New Haven, and died in Thomaston. Thomaston is located in Litchfield County, home of Litchfield Distillery: their award-winning Straight Bourbon Whiskey is 92 proof, so if you need to find a substitute, be sure to use something similarly strong. Jim Beam Devil’s Cut bourbon, for example, is 90 proof and would be an appropriate way to make Old Scratch pay his respects to the new Blessed.
And Blessed Michael’s supernatural home, of course, is Heaven, but it is also his membership in the Catholic Church to which he remained loyal and true in face of persistent anti-Catholic prejudice. We can honor Michael’s fidelity to the Church of Rome with Pallini limoncello, made by a family-owned business from the Eternal City.
Oh. And the spoon betokens Father Michael’s boyhood job making spoons in a brass mill.
If sheltering in place is driving you crazy, try a cocktail just as insane. I invented the offbeat Holed Up three years ago for Regnery Publishing’s 70th anniversary in honor of their patron saint, Simeon of Trier. As it turns out, Simeon was a hermit who lived in a gate tower in Trier, Germany called the Porta Nigra, and the Porta Nigra is Regnery’s colophon (see illustration). Simeon’s feast day (in Trier, at least) is June 1, so it is time to roll out this drink again but with an added, COVID-19 meaning in mind.
2 oz. Blüfeld Riesling wine
1 oz. elderflower liqueur (or less)
1½ oz. club soda
1 dash angostura bitters
Build all ingredients into an old-fashioned glass filled with ice. Stir gently for a Russell Kirk version, violently for an Ann Coulter version.
The ingredients of the Holed Up were meant to honor aspects of Regnery’s history and mission as well as St. Simeon’s biography. The Amarena cherry is in memory of St. Simeon’s homeland of Italy. Riesling wine honors the famous Mosel region of Germany, where Wilhelm Regnery (founder Henry Regnery’s grandfather) worked as a winemaker and where St. Simeon spent his final years, while Blüfeld honors the color blue, the original color of conservatism before some nincompoop at NBC screwed things up with his “red” and “blue” states. Elderflower liqueur pays tribute to the wisdom of the elders which St. Simeon and Regnery have sought to conserve. And bitters reflect the bitter truth to which St. Simeon and Regnery are committed in season and out.
And the toast?
“In gratitude to Regnery for publishing The Politically Incorrect Guide to Christianity, Drinking with the Saints, Drinking with Saint Nick, and Drinking with Your Patron Saints: Through the intercession of St. Simeon of Trier, who spent the last seven years of his life in a small cell, may we soon be free of the pandemic COVID-19 and all its confinements, and may Regnery and its readers [and that includes you!] always keep their heads holed up high.”
This month we held a contest on our Facebook page for who could come up with the best cocktail in honor of St. Corona, the third-century virgin and martyr who is currently being invoked against the COVID-19 virus. On April 17 (Easter Friday) five judges assembled and, observing social distancing as best they could, taste-tested the entries. We announced the winner last night on a live virtual happy hour, which attracted almost forty people. Congratulations to Chris Kandas, who earned himself a signed copy of Drinking with Your Patron Saints!
Almost all the contestants’ submissions were outstanding—as far as we could tell, that is. For unfortunately, we were unable to find one or more of the ingredients for several entries and were therefore unable to test them. As lamentable as this, it unintentionally conforms to the “Waco Purchase Rule” I used when composing the Drinking with the Saints trilogy, the rule being that for the most part, if I could not find an ingredient here in Waco, Texas, I would not include it in the book. My thinking was that because Waco is neither the best nor the worst place in the country for buying alcohol, it is a good indication of what the average American has access to. I did, of course, break this rule on occasion, happily buying cardamom bitters and Toschini black cherries online. But with respect to this contest, we had no choice but to obey the rule, for there were some ingredients we simply could not purchase short of a four-hour roadtrip.
In any event, here are the results of our contest. Flawed though they may be, we were thrilled with the top three winners and tickled by them all.
FIRST PRIZE: Old European Corona
By Chris Kandas
2 oz. Kilbrin Irish whisky sherry cask
¾ oz. Quintas Ruby Red port (to bring out the dries red fruit of the whisky more)
¾ oz. Bénédictine liqueur (adds necessary sweetness, is a nod to the Italian saint, and brings a French touch to this European cocktail)
2 dashes Angostura bitters (I used AZ Bitter Lab’s Mi Casa bitters)
2 dashes orange bitters (I used AZ Bitter Lab’s orange sunshine bitters, of which everyone should order a bottle. Orange, saffron, and fennel! I’ll also point out that AZ (Arizona) is known for our redemptive suffering heat, which is expected to slow the spread of this disease)
Pour all ingredients into a shaker with ice and shake forty times. Strain into a cocktail glass.
Tasters’ Notes: Chris says he based this cocktail on a Jameson Old-Fashioned, but this creative mix of flavors was to us more evocative of a Boulevardier. Tasters found it smooth and well-balanced with a nice finish. The red color is beautiful and fitting for a drink honoring a martyr. We did not use any of the brands that Chris recommended and it was still good: we can’t wait to try the Platonic Form version of it.
SECOND PRIZE: St. Corona’s Cocktail
By AnnaMaria Cardinalli
For the rim, a “crown” (see below)
1½ oz. Amaretto
⅔ oz. simple syrup
fresh juice of ½ lime (1 tbsp.)
Begin by preparing the cocktail’s crown: Grate the zest of one lime, and cover it liberally on a flat dish with equal parts sugar and salt. (It is best if the citrus peel is left to candy this way as long as possible–ideally 24 hours–before serving, but the wait is unnecessary if time does not permit.) Mix coarsely, and rim a large old-fashioned glass, first with lime and then with this mixture.
For the cocktail, fill the glass with ice and add Amaretto, simple syrup, and lime juice. Stir. Top with Prosecco.
Symbolism: The strands of bright green that will stand out from the cocktail’s crown can represent the palm branches that formed part of St. Corona’s martyrdom, those of Passion Sunday which we approach, and the spiky tentacles of the virus against which we invoke St. Corona’s intercession and Our Lord’s victory!
Tasters’ Notes: One of the better champagne (er, prosecco) cocktails we have had; we were surprised at how well the Amaretto balanced the lime juice and prosecco. The “crown” (rim) was genius: several of us were skeptical about the mixture of zest, salt, and sugar, but it worked. We tried the “instant” rather than the “candied” version, and it still worked. And the visual presentation of the crown was excellent. Finally, the panelists were impressed with the allegorical explanation.
One suggestion: How about a chilled champagne flute or coupe glass instead of an old-fashioned?
THIRD PRIZE: Golden Crown
By Michael Astfalk
fresh juice of ½ lemon (2 tbsp.)
½ oz. Grand Marnier
½ oz. limoncello
1½ oz. Slane Irish Whiskey
dash of orange bitters (I used Wigle Pomander Orange)
3 oz. tonic water
Add ice to an old fashioned glass. Build ingredients and stir. Sip and enjoy. Try with 1 ounce less tonic water for a slightly boozier drink.
Symbolism: Slane Whiskey is for Slane, the hill where St Patrick lit his paschal fire that led to Ireland’s conversion. May our resurrected Lord’s Fire of Love during the Easter season convert hearts and lead to a new springtime of Faith out of this pandemic. The Limoncello is a nod to Italy, giving a yellow “corona” to the drink, a golden crown. The tonic water contains quinine, which is an old anti-malarial treatment. If one malaria drug works, wouldn’t another?
Tasters’ Notes: This is a refreshing summer drink, sweet but not overpowering. One judge called it a “sophisticated Mountain Dew,” which he meant as a compliment! And all the panelists were impressed with the thoughtful allegorical explanation of the ingredients.
Note: The rest of these entries are listed in the order they were received and are not ranked according to taste.
1. Arrghen’t You Glad I Didn’t Say Corona
By Judy Bronson
1½ oz. Probitas White Blended Rum
1 oz. Crown Royal
1 oz. Byrrh Quinquina
1 oz. Meyer lemon juice
1 oz. orange juice
¾ oz. crème de banane liqueur
1 tspn. Herbsaint
Shake over ice, strain over fresh ice into your favorite pirate-themed tiki glass (St. Corona was the patron saint of treasure hunters, after all) or skull mug (in honor of her martyrdom) and garnish with a sprig of mint.
I started out with Crown Royal because of the Corona connection. I wanted to go in a tiki direction, hence the tropical elements of rum, lemon, orange, and banana, because what is more of an escape from our current woes than imagining we are existing in a beautiful tropical paradise? The Byrrh quinquina brings the cure (quinine) and Herbsaint hearkens back to absinthe, the original vermifuge. It isn’t likely to cure anything serious, but it makes any quarantine a heck of a lot more fun. Cheers!
Tasters’ Notes: Judy calls this a tiki cocktail fit for a saint and/or a pandemic, and we bet she is right, but we could not taste it! We were going to fudge on the Probitas rum and used Cruzan instead, but we figured there was no substituting for the unique French aperitif Byrrh Grand Quinquina, which is not available locally. Judy provided her own photo, which as you can see, is fantastic. And she was smart to invent a tiki cocktail, which are experiencing a Renaissance these days.
2. Miraculous Quinine
By Marian Van Til-Cassidy
2 oz. bourbon (I used Elijah Craig)
4 oz. tonic water (Q Beverages makes a great one: extra carbonated, intense quinine taste, only mildly sweet, as it uses agave, not sugar)
5-10 dashes Angostura bitters, to taste. (For a stronger, slightly fruity option, add another ounce of bourbon, an ounce more of tonic, and an ounce of cranberry juice. Adjust bitters. Some might consider this a different drink.)
Tasters’ Notes: Folks did their homework by including ingredients with quinine: although it does nothing to stop COVID-19, it recalls the happy days when it stopped malaria and earned the epithet “miraculous.” Marian’s bourbon and tonic water (with lots of bitters added) is one such example, and it certainly does the trick. Panelists described her submission as “satisfying,” a “reliable go-to in the future,” and evocative of the halcyon days of whiskey-and-sodas. We imagine Evelyn Waugh (or one of his characters) drinking too many of these were he alive today.
3. Corona Sunrise
By the Seaside Bartender
1½ oz. tequila
1 oz. grenadine
2 oz. orange juice
½ bottle Corona Extra
Combine tequila and orange juice in a pint glass. Add grenadine and ice, then fill with ice-cold Corona Extra. Garnish with orange slice.
Symbolism: The fact that it is a sunrise drink could represent the hope of finding a cure and a vaccine. The sun also has its own corona, which is visible during solar eclipses. Since we are experiencing an “eclipse of the Church” right now, it seems fitting.
You could also replace the tequila with an Italian liquor like grappa. I’m not sure how that would taste.
Tasters’ Notes: Scott Alexander came up with this idea, googled the ingredients, and found out that it already exists (we hate when that happens!). He decided to post it anyway, and we’re glad that he did. The Corona Sunrise is a fun cross between a Tequila Sunrise and a beergarita. Trying it with grappa, however, sounds a little scary.
4. Silver Corona
By Laurie Hilger
lemon and lime slices
2 oz. silver tequila
Muddle some lemon and lime slices in the bottom of an old-fashioned glass. Add ice and tequila. Stir. Top with soda water. Stir again and enjoy!
Tasters’ Notes: Laurie Hilger opines that her Silver Corona will be most refreshing to share with friends and family in a few weeks when the weather warms, and we think she is right. You can never go wrong with lemon, lime, and tequila, and the sparkling water is a nice touch.
5. Crown of Glory
By Margaret Kennedy
3-4 montmorency cherries that have soaked for at least a month in fine Kentucky bourbon
1 tsp. of syrup from the bourbon-soaked cherry jar
6 oz. Prosecco, chilled
2 mint leaves
Add cherries and syrup to a champagne flute glass. Pour in Prosecco and garnish with mint leaves.
Note: If you don’t have time to soak the cherries, the proper substitution for the bourbon-soaked cherries and syrup is 3-4 luxardo cherries (the original maraschino cherry) with a large splash of bourbon.
Symbolism: The crisp sparkling wine represents the beauty and innocence of the virgin martyr. The red cherry syrup represents the blood shed of the martyrs. The fine Kentucky bourbon represents the richness of our Catholic faith and traditions. And the mint leaves represent a fresh new springtime and renewal for our Holy Catholic Church. The cherries represent shining red rubies in the crown of glory!
Tasters’ Notes: We were not able to soak the cherries, and we had to use Toschini black cherries instead of luxardo, but we still enjoyed this delicious champagne cocktail. Taking syrup from the cherry jar was an excellent decision, and the mint garnish gives the drinker’s nose a fragrant surprise just as he is about to consume that pairs nicely with the drink’s flavor profile. The panelists were also impressed with Margaret’s sharp allegorizing.
6. M-m-m-my Corona
By Jeffrey Williams
1 oz. Crown Royal whiskey
1 oz. Cream of Coconut (Coco Lopez)
1 oz. Aperol liqueur
½ oz. orange juice
⅓ oz. simple syrup
Add all ingredients in a cocktail shaker with ice. Strain and serve in a martini glass with an orange twist garnish.
Symbolism: Crown Royal was selected as Corona means crown in Latin. Cream of coconut represents the palm trees that led to the martyrdom of St. Corona. The Aperol liquor is from the same Northern Italy region where her relics are preserved. The pink color of the drink represents the young female martyrdom of Saint Corona.
Tasters’ Notes: This cocktail looks great! Did you notice the Drinking with the Saints cocktail glass in the photo, which, ahem, we sell on our website? But tragically, we thought that the Coco Lopez cream of coconut was a liqueur rather than coconut milk’s richer and sweeter cousin (which, it turns out, it is). And so when we could not find it in the liquor store, we gave up on it. ‘Tis a shame, for our mouths were watering over the beautiful color of this drink. And what a great title!
7. The St. Corona
By Brian Keenan
2 oz. hard cider (We tried with both Bold Rock and Angry Orchard and preferred the Angry Orchard)
¾ oz. Goldschlager stirred on ice and strained into a cocktail glass.
1 dash grenadine
Pour cider and Goldschlager into a mixing glass with ice and stir. Strain into a cocktail glass and top with grenadine.
Symbolism: As St. Corona is especially venerated in Bavaria and Austria, a schnapps is fitting. Moreover, since she is a patroness of treasure hunters, Goldschlager seems especially appropriate. Finally, the grenadine’s red color symbolizes St. Corona’s blood shed for sake of Christ, and adds a nice sweet finish to the drink. The St. Corona. Enjoy.
Tasters’ Notes: A bold and adventurous outlier with an unconventional combination of ingredients. Not for the faint of heart.
8. St. Corona’s Cure-all Cocktail
By Sam Esparza
2 oz. gin (my preference is Roku Japanese Gin but feel free to use your favorite)
½ oz. ginger liqueur
½ oz. St Germain Elderflower liqueur
1 oz. tonic water
1 oz. Sprite
Shake all ingredients except the tonic water and Sprite, fill a Collins glass with ice and pour. Top with the tonic water and Sprite and garnish with a lemon twist.
Tasters’ Notes: Another heartbreaking moment. Despite our best efforts, we could not locate ginger liqueur in order to try what looks like a delicious recipe.
9. A Quarantine in Thyme
By Beth Richards
1½ oz. Crown Royal whiskey
2 oz. grapefruit juice
2 dashes Angostura bitters
1 sprig of thyme
Shake all ingredients except the sparkling water in a shaker with ice forty times. Strain into an old-fashioned glass with ice and top with sparkling water.
Tasters’ Notes: Beth gets an Honorable Mention for this one, if only for the title! The Crown Royal is a clever nod to the meaning of “Corona,” and the grapefruit juice pairs nicely with the whiskey. We recommend a grapefruit juice that is on the sweeter side; it will not overpower the drink.
By Tom Ward
2 oz. Calamity gin
1 tsp. Drambuie
Pour ingredients into a mixing glass with ice and stir until ice cold. Strain into a cocktail glass and serve without garnish (who would garnish in these complex times?).
Explanation: The coronavirus cocktail must demonstrate that harmony can emerge from apparent chaos. In our own case the chaos is due more to the opposition of the parts rather than their great number. And yet as Catholics we believe that although history is indeed catastrophic, it is eucatastrophic: the unexpected twist which brings order out of chaos, a happy ending out of a tragedy. As we know, one must never mix clear and brown, else disaster ensues. Likewise, one must never mix a novel coronavirus and human beings. Yet God in his providence has permitted this gruesome mixture. And we know by faith that the mixture will be good. And so I present to you that Eucatastrophe: a martini gone wrong but which somehow works. Cheers.
Tasters’ Notes: Believe it or not, Tom pulled it off. Although the Eucatastrophe is unlikely to surpass the martini in popularity, it really is a fine drink and something to keep in mind should catastrophe strike your supply of dry vermouth. And the choice of Calamity gin for a cocktail on this theme is inspired. But since Tom was one of the judges on our panel, we had to disqualify this intriguing concoction from the contest.
Last week Aleteia‘s Larry Peterson broke the story that there actually is a Saint Corona (a 2nd century virgin and martyr), that her relics are in the basilica of the town of Anzu (in the middle of the Italian Coronavirus pandemic, it turns out), and that–get this–she is invoked in Bavaria and other parts of Italy against pandemics.
To honor this singular saint (and to have something to do while we are all holed up), we are sponsoring a Cocktail Contest. Here are the rules:
- Like and follow the Drinking with the Saints Facebook page and spread the word with like-minded pious tipplers.
- Come up with a cocktail to honor St. Corona. It can either be something that you have discovered or something you have invented. You cannot rename a preexisting cocktail and submit it, however, unless you have also altered the recipe enough to make it your own invention. How much is enough? We follow the one-third rule: if one-third the original recipe is no longer the same, it is a new creation.
- Once you have your cocktail idea, post it on our Facebook page.
- The winning cocktail will be the one that most appropriately honors Saint Corona and tastes great.
- The winning cocktail will be determined by a super-secret (and self-isolated!) test-tasting panel of committed drinkers.
- The winner will be announced live during a Virtual Holy Happy Hour on Palm Sunday, April 5, from 5 pm CST to 6 pm to which all are invited! (Details TBA).
- The winner will receive a free signed and personalized copy of Drinking with Your Patron Saints and a handsome Drinking with the Saints apron (total retail value of $55). Free stuff in the mail!
Drinking with Your Patron Saints has over 700 listed patronages, that is, causes for
petitioning a particular saint for help. The list includes places (such as various countries), occupations (from accountants to zookeepers), hobbies (woodworking, surfing, sports), and problems (difficult marriages, disappointing children (!), health troubles, etc.). And yes, since there are patron saints for contagious disease, there are patron saints you can invoke against the coronavirus (Saints Christopher, Sebastian, and Roch, to name a few).
To find your patron saint, see if you can find a saint for your birthplace or ethnicity. Sorry, we don’t do individual U.S. states, although you can think big and pray to Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception, patroness of the U.S.A., or Our Lady of Guadalupe, Empress of the Americas.
Next, try to find your job in the list. If it is not listed, broaden the search to a more generic field or adjust it somehow. If you are an orthopedist, for example, and do not find an entry for that career, you might look under “medical professionals” for the patronage of Saint Luke or Raphael or “foot problems” for the patronage of Saint Peter.
Also check out your hobbies and activities. There are not many patron saints for individual sports, but St. Sebastian is the patron saint of all athletes and would welcome you as a client. I did, however, manage to track down some rather unknown patronages. Our Lady of Ghisallo is the patroness of cyclists, and Our Lady of Castellazzo is the patroness of bikers (motorcycles). And, of course, you should say a prayer to St. Christopher every time you get behind the wheel of a car or truck.
Finally, don’t forget your name. Chances are you share a first name with a saint, even if your parents named you after Uncle Bill or Aunt Sally. The feast day of the saint
after whom you were named is called your “name day”–find it and celebrate it with gusto. And if your first name is not explicitly Christian, no worries. Over the years, parents’ name choices have grown less devotional and more colorful—literally in some cases, as with Amber, Auburn, and Cyan. (And what’s the deal with naming your kids after jobs that no longer exist, like Cooper and Tanner? I await the day when I meet someone named Solo Saxophonist or Travel Agent.) But this is not an insurmountable problem: use your confirmation name if you have one, or simply attach yourself to a saint with whom you feel a special kinship.
And many names have a Christian origin despite appearances to the contrary. Devotion to the Blessed Virgin Mary, for instance, is hidden under many common girls’ names. “Regina,” or queen, is for the Queen of Heaven, “Grace” for Our Lady of Grace, “Dolores” for Our Lady of Seven Sorrows, “Soledad” for Our Lady of Solitude, and “Hope” for Our Lady of Hope or Our Lady of Perpetual Help. Similarly, your name may simply be a variation of a saint’s name. If you are Caitlyn, Karen, or Kathleen, you share a name with Saints Catherine of Alexandria and Catherine of Siena. Do a little research into the history and meaning of your name, and you may be surprised by its connection to a saint.
Drinking with Your Patron Saints, which we will speak more about in the coming days, debuts on St. Patrick’s Day, and like its two older brothers (Drinking with the Saints and Drinking with Saint Nick), it has cool artwork on the front cover (see above).
As you may have guessed, the beer that the old man is holding is the handiwork of the crack art team at Regnery Publishing. The original painting, depicting St. Christopher crossing a river, is from the workshop of Joachim Patinir (1480-1524), a Flemish Renaissance painter. Although we do not know who the author is, that did not stop the painting from being auctioned at Christie’s in 2012 for a tidy £37,000. Fortunately, you can get your copy for only $19.99, with numerous drinking suggestions included at no extra charge.
While the artist’s identity may remain a mystery, the story he tells is of a famous legend in the annals of the saints.
Reprobus was a giant of a man (7½ feet tall) from the third century who wanted to serve the greatest king ever. He enlisted in the service of a mighty potentate, but when he noticed that the man was afraid of the devil, he left him to serve the Prince of Darkness. That did not last long, however: when Reprobus noticed that the devil was afraid of a roadside cross, he rightly reasoned that Christ was the mightiest of all.
After converting, Reprobus sought the advice of a holy hermit. The hermit told him to fast: Reprobus said he couldn’t. The hermit told him to offer many prayers. Ignorant of how to pray, Reprobus again asked for something else. Finally, the hermit suggested that he put his large stature to good use and ferry people across a dangerous river on his shoulders. (We suspect that the holy hermit is the elderly fellow on the riverbank, although it is odd that Reprobus is moving towards him.)
Anyway, Reprobus happily agreed to the task until one night he was awoken by a small
child asking for passage. As they crossed the river, Reprobus almost collapsed and drowned under the little one’s enormous weight. When the exhausted giant complained after they reached the other side, the child replied: “Be not astonished: thou bearest him who beareth the world.” Do you see the world on Christopher’s shoulders in the painting? We almost made it into a bottle of Chambord for the cover before deciding against it.
As proof that He was who He said He was, the Child commanded Reprobus to plant his staff in the ground, at which point it blossomed into a palm tree with leaves and dates. Our Lord then baptized Reprobus personally, changing his name from Reprobus (Latin for “rejected”) to Christopher (Greek for “Christ-bearer”). The Christ-bearer went on to suffer martyrdom for his fearless preaching of the Gospel. Christopher also became the enormously popular saint of ferrymen and their passengers, freight ships and their crews, gardeners, motorists, pilgrims, sailors, skiers, surfers, and, of course, travelers. We also think that he should patronize Uber drivers.
When you are done traveling, there are a number of drinks with which to toast St. Christopher for a safe journey, and you can find them in Drinking with Your Patron Saints. Cheers!
The Catholic world rejoices as Cardinal John Henry Newman is canonized this Sunday, October 13. Time to start celebrating. But what should we drink in honor of England’s most famous convert ? We offer the following suggestions.
In his college days Newman played snapdragon, a risky game in which raisins are snatched out of a dish of burning brandy and eaten alight. Coincidentally, snapdragon is also the name of the flower that grew on the wall opposite Newman’s freshman lodgings at Trinity College in Oxford and came to symbolize in his mind his “own perpetual residence even unto death” at his beloved university, a residency that, thanks to his conversion, was to be far from perpetual.
Tonight, savor the lifestyle of a Victorian English gentleman with your finest port or brandy. You can also play snapdragon with your friends: it is traditionally a Christmastide game, but on October 13, 1848, Newman wrote that he had played it recently—perhaps on this very day. Better yet, drop three raisins in a glass of brandy and drink to Blessed John Henry (three to symbolize Newman’s alma mater of Trinity College and his theological work in service to the Triune God). You can call the drink a Snapdragon, though we don’t advise setting it on fire.
Or, have a Cardinal cocktail. The (London) dry gin can symbolize Newman’s English identity and the Campari his sometimes bittersweet turn to Rome/Italy.
1 oz. gin
¾ oz. Campari
¾ oz. dry vermouth
1 lemon twist
Stir ingredients except lemon twist in a mixing glass or shaker filled with ice and strain into a cocktail glass. Garnish with lemon.
Beer and Wine
As we know from his letters, young Newman enjoyed “fine strong beer.” Honor Newman’s good taste with a St. Peter’s Organic English Ale, an English brew that our friend Dr. Robert Kirby selected in order to celebrate the occasion when, following Newman’s footsteps, he left Canterbury for Rome. The “organic” is evocative of organic development in Church doctrine, a notion which Newman famously explored and explained, and the “St. Peter’s” can serve as an obvious reference to the Barque which Newman boarded to the astonishment of all.
As for wine, an older Newman praised a dinner he had in Langres, France, that included claret, burgundy, sherry, and rum. Use your discretion to fill in the details.
Newman stands out among the great figures mentioned in Drinking With the Saints because he is the only one on record for proposing a toast. Here is the full passage, from his Letter to the Duke of Norfolk:
Certainly, if I am obliged to bring religion into after-dinner toasts (which indeed does not seem quite the thing), I shall drink—to the Pope, if you please—still, to Conscience first, and to the Pope afterwards.
Newman’s remark is often misconstrued as a green light to dissent from the Church’s teachings, but it was actually meant to affirm the doctrine of papal infallibility properly understood. For Newman, the key to conscience is that it is is well-formed, which requires a great deal of study, docility, and humility—qualities not often found today among religious naysayers.
As for Newman’s opinion about the incompatibility of religion and after-dinner toasts, our own well-formed (or at least well-marinated) conscience compels us to dissent.
And so a toast: To Conscience first, Saint John Henry Newman next, and the Pope afterwards.